the coriolis effect

Not only did I not notice at the time (stopping roadside in the DR for plantains) I didn't even notice later except that fresco was missing the s.

"Fresh sin." Thats what it says. Thats the photo I gave my mom for Christmas. Not, as it should say (or shouldn't?) 'fresh fish".

The plane for Micronesia left today and instead it is a sunny 40 degrees in DC and New York for New Years maybe after all. And 6 months of a desk job. um. ooooookay.

little tree
little silent Christmas tree
you are so little
you are more like a flower

who found you in the green forest
and were you very sorry to come away?
see i will comfort you
because you smell so sweetly

i will kiss your cool bark
and hug you safe and tight
just as your mother would,
only don’t be afraid

look the spangles
that sleep all the year in a dark box
dreaming of being taken out and allowed to shine,
the balls the chains red and gold the fluffy threads,

put up your little arms
and i’ll give them all to you to hold
every finger shall have its ring
and there won’t a single place dark or unhappy
then when you’re quite dressed

you’ll stand in the window for everyone to see
and how they’ll stare!
oh but you’ll be very proud

and my little sister and i will take hands
and looking up at our beautiful tree
we’ll dance and sing“Noel Noel”
- e. e. cummings

SO true. And true most of all for me because my biggest stress right now is the idea that before by virtue of sheer laziness I lolled around my room and wasted time online (not even PRODUCTIVE time- I forgot how to enjoy websurfing years and years and years ago) and now its what I am supposed to be doing by doctor's orders. Instead of working at the theater, and tutoring and (I babysat for the first time! it went ok!) earning money and spreading baked goods year end cheer.
Also, I am reading The Return of Tarzan, having purchased it oh, a decade ago but also having only gotten around to reading Tarzan #1 for class three years ago. Turns out Tarzan is 22. Our age. Pretty soon he will be younger. And instead of fighting Numa myself I am wasting time online. hrm. Ok, enough. ENOUGH. I'm going to go live it w. Mr. JCT while he's just my age. As long as I don't have to languish in a lifeboat a la Miss Porter.

and the feeling's mutual when, filling out the form in the doctor's office (when did I last fill out a form in the doctor's office? I've had the same pediatrician for- ever...) I hit work information. employer- the one who I was part timing with or the one who I will be minimum waging with? forget the address...occupation? student feels like a fraud, somehow, but flaneur didn't even come to mind in the setting.

monoplane, monodrama, monotony ending, just when I guess my body (if not my mind, and certainly not the instant messenger police who have me on probation) needs it most. doctor sez: you probably shouldn't stay up til midnight on new years. flora thinks: 3 day bender in noo yawk? blast. maybe it was the communal wine at the holden party. why I don't do drugs (and so I've said): the one time - one college party since graduating, one kiss, or one tailgate, its the wallflower who ends up with the proverbial bad joint, isn't it? oh, mono....or maybe its already run its course, and I've been so lazy lately I haven't even noticed.

so then and again. good thing I didn't go to micronesia.......but in the world of ironies, at least then I would have had real health insurance.

Boston again, for blockmates and others and lots of Chesnekov. Not Germany but then Germany doesn't have fresh- made banitsa. Or Charlie's Kitchen.

Or Widener, though I'm still too sheepish to go inside. Instead, sat on the Mem Church steps listening to music.

And fondly remembered CompLit: "Here I became aware of the world's tenderness, the profound benificence of all that surrounded me, the blissful bond between me and all of creation, and I realized that the joy I sought in you was not only secreted within you, but breathed around me everywhere, in the speeding street sounds, in the hem of a comically lifted skirt, in the metallic yet tender drone of the wind, in the autumn clouds bloated with rain. I realized that the world does not represent a struggle at all, or a precarious sequence of chance events, but shimmering bliss, benificent trepidation, a gift bestowed on us and unappreciated." - Nabokov

MPhil proposal (drumroll....): The shifting paradigm of Utopia in South American culture(s).

When I, you know, bother to fill out the app that I've been talking about for three months. But to any and all people who can hack me into jstor, I will loan you my soul. Maybe. Because taking the Metro to the Library of Congress might be as draining as being soulless in December, but I'll be up for it come cherry blossom time.

mmmm Cherry Blossoms. "I've travelled 'round/Through deserts on my horse/But jokes aside/ I wanna come back home ..."